I had a
request to tell this story from my sister and I said I would never tell
it! But, since my daughter asked for
this story….I’ll tell it. But, oh! The mental scarring that will occur as I re-live
this horrendous event in my life! My
life has been mis-shapen from this event and I don’t know if I will ever
recover! (HA!)
When I was
growing up typically we did not get to do much of the Halloween thing for a
couple of reasons:
1. It cost money
2. We lived a long way from town
Since it
cost money to buy costumes, ours tended to be of the home made variety. Normally we were cowboys (best costumes ever,
right?), wore our hats and chaps, carried ropes and real live guns to school. Heck, Dad would even take a black marker and
draw some really cool looking mustaches on us (probably the only time in my
life I was able to have a handlebar mustache on my face!)
But the year
I was in the second grade, I turned into a rebel. I had listened to all my friends brag about their
store bought costumes and I decided that is what I wanted. I managed to convince my brother that this
was the road we should go down, guess I thought we could force our parents to
buy said costumes. I had plans on going
as Dracula and had even scoped out the costume that I was going to wear! All of this was done about a week before Halloween,
so we were on a pretty short runaway already.
The day before we were going to wear our costumes to school, we got a
lesson in economics. Just because we
wanted it, doesn’t mean there was money available to purchase it! (There’s a
lesson our government could learn!) So
for reason number one, above, we did not have costumes and even if we did have
the money, reason number two would have come into play as we had waited until
the last minute to spring this on Mom and Dad.
So Mom came up with a solution (as Mom’s tend to do in times of stress
and strain). Since I had convinced us
that we did not want to be cowboys, this was the best solution Mom had. She took a white sheet, cut it in half and cut
two hole toward the center of each half as eye holes. BAM, Mom genius!
Now the life
scarring part…..
Cully, my brother
got his half and it looked ok. When I got
my half….OH, the horror! As I stood
there looking, through the eye holes of my costume, at myself in the full
length mirror….all I could see was the blue and green flowers all around the
bottom edge of my costume. A real life
horror story was unfolding for me! I am
not sure if this was luck of the draw or I was being punished for being so
conniving! I quickly shucked it off and
said, “I changed my mind, I wanna go as a cowboy!” But, since I was last minute…there was no
time! As Mom hurried us out the door to
get on the bus at 6:00am, she said “I’m sure no one will notice just turn it
inside out!” I felt like I was in the
Christmas Story….all I wanted was that Red Ryder BB gun and here I was a
flowerdy ghost!
As I sat on
the bus, with my costume in a brown paper bag…I eased my hand in and flipped
the edge of the costume inside out…alas…the flowers shown thru on both
sides! My mind went into overdrive
trying to think how I was going to convince my brother that my costume was
better than his! But I must have worn
out my tongue on convincing him that we could get store bought costumes because
he was having none of it. He told me in
no uncertain terms where I could stick my flowerdy ghost costume! So I sat the rest of the ride in silence as I
thought of all of my buddies to whom I had bragged to about my Dracula costume…however
was I going to live this down?
When I got
to school, I let everyone know that I had forgotten my costume. And being the lying conniving little turd
that I was, I also told them that it was a Dracula costume I had
forgotten. This held true until my brother’s
buddies came around…then the flowerdy ghost story came out! Once the truth came out…there was nothing
else to do, but eat my words! Needless to
say when I came time to wear the costumes I refused to wear mine and just went
as myself!
Long story
short…if you have the chance to be a cowboy or anything you want to be…always
be a cowboy! There is no shame in being
a cowboy….but there is plenty of shame in being a flowerdy ghost, especially if
you mouth gets you in that ghost costume!
Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from telling
lies.
Psalms 34:13
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